The Hair Monsters

“Do you know about the hair, Mom?” Fred asked.

“Um, I guess so?” She looked a question at Dad, who just shrugged. She ate her mashed potatoes.

“The hair that gets all over the house, that gets swept up.”

“It comes from hair monsters.” Fred rolled peas onto his spoon and ate them, one by one.

“Oh yeah?” Mom put down her fork. “Tell me about the hair monsters.”

“Well, they steal our hair. That’s why we aren’t all covered with hair. But we got rid of most of ’em, so we have to go to barbers.”

“What do they do with the hair?” Mom went to the kitchen. “I’m listening,” she called.

“Well, it’s their food, and they build with it. It’s only the pieces they drop that we see.”

“Oh, I get it now.” Mom returned and sprinkled a seasoning on Fred’s potatoes.”

“What’s this?” he asked.

“I forgot to add some seasoning. Try it.” He looked dubious. “One bite, and if you don’t like it, you can stop.”

He took the bite. A moment later, he was face down in his mashed potatoes.

“Was that really necessary, hon?” Dad asked.

“He was getting too close,” she said.

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